標題: 冷的寒颤的幽默 [打印本頁]
作者:
zida861231 時間: 2010-3-31 11:04 AM 標題: 冷的寒颤的幽默
网上搜集了一点冷笑话供大家消遣一下！！
1.[url=#]老婆！10点‘整’吗？[/url]
场景：老婆在上网 老公躺在床上问
老公：“老婆！现在几点了？”
老婆：“10点！”
老公：“整吗？”
老婆（扭捏）：“再等等，邻居还没有休息呢！”
老公（汗）：“10点整嘛！”
老婆（微怒）：“11点再整！”
老公（狂汗）：“我问是10点整吗？”
老婆（怒）：“跟你说了，等11点再整！”
老公（抓狂）：“你妈的！我问你是不是10点整！”
老婆（大怒）：“整！整！整！你一天不整我，不得劲是不？”
老公（无可奈何，低三下四）：“我问你现在是不是10点整！”
老婆：“整！现在就整”！
2.孕妇和烂萝卜的相同之处是什么？
一天哥几个在一块小聚，突然大哥问了个问题：“孕妇和烂萝卜的相同之处是什么？”。老二不假思索的说：还不都是虫子在作怪！老三不屑的看了老二一眼，说：一看就是个雏，都是拔得太晚了！！！
3.一天蚊子跟螳螂去偷看一女的洗澡，蚊子很自豪的说：看，十年前我在她胸前叮了两口，现在肿的这么大了；螳螂不服气的说，那有什么，我十年前在她两腿间劈了一刀，至今还每个月都在流血……
4.袋鼠和青蛙去嫖鸡，袋鼠三下两下完事，只听隔壁的青蛙整夜一二三嘿！一二三嘿！袋sd鼠好羡慕，次日，袋鼠说：“哇！~~蛙兄，你好棒哦！。”青蛙说：“操，老子一夜都没跳上床！~~”
5.一只大象问骆驼：“你的咪咪怎么长在背上？”骆驼说：“死远点，我不和鸡鸡长在脸上的东西讲话！”蛇在旁边听了大象和骆驼的对话后一阵狂笑。大象扭头对蛇说：“笑屁！你个脸长在鸡鸡上的，没资格！”
6.有位穷书生发奋读书，就在自己的房门前写下对联以自励，上联是：‘睡草屋闭户演字’，下联是：‘卧脚塌弄笛声腾’，横批：‘甘从天命’。有一天，一个河南人路过此地，见到这副对联就心生好奇，用他的家乡话大声地念了起来：‘谁操我屁股眼子’，‘我叫他弄得生疼’……呦，还有横批！不过这次他给念反了：‘明天重干！’”
7.幼儿园女教师领学生游泳,不慎露出一根X毛,一学生问老师,那是什么啊女教师一狠心将其拔掉,说线头！
8.小女孩总是向小男孩炫耀自己的新玩具.小男孩没办法,只好脱掉裤子说这个你永远没有!女孩也脱掉裤子说我妈说只要有这个,你那玩意儿要多少有多少！
9.一排* 女在街边等客，一位八旬老妇见到了,好奇的问：你们在等什么？* 女没好气的说：等棒棒糖！老妇也就排队加入队伍等糖，结果被wowo.com抓，wowo.com问老妇：你牙都没了也能干？老妇笑着曰：我可以舔的！！！
10.司机送领导参加文艺晚会,领导进了会场,司机被保安拦住,司机说我跟领导是一个系统的,保安说：鸡跟蛋也是一个系统的,鸡X进去了,蛋能进去吗？
作者:
zida861231 時間: 2010-3-31 12:39 PM 標題: 自己先顶
顶顶顶顶！！！
作者:
fjwocmsldj 時間: 2011-2-1 10:27 AM 標題: 本科?????失如何??★加QQ57269887★
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作者:
旌綴暱珛刓豫 時間: 2011-2-2 03:17 AM 標題: 大???????QQ896.868.388????◎????◎????◎??
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作者:
kprnfdlpen 時間: 2011-2-2 07:19 AM 標題: 全??算机3?????★加QQ66698208★
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作者:
旌綴暱珛刓豫 時間: 2011-2-2 07:53 AM 標題: 假英?四六?成??★加QQ896868388★
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作者:
旌綴暱珛刓豫 時間: 2011-2-2 11:47 AM 標題: 做cet-6假?QQ896868388★?▲★▲★◎◎▲★▲★▲▲▲
做cet-6假??QQ896.868.388★?▲★▲★◎◎▲★▲★▲▲▲
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作者:
kprnfdlpen 時間: 2011-2-3 03:56 AM 標題: ?家?算机三?★加QQ66698208★
?家?算机三?★加QQ66698208★?家?算机三?★加QQ：66698208★
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作者:
fjwocmsldj 時間: 2011-2-3 07:51 AM 標題: ?海代?身份?公章qq57269887
?海代?身份?公章qq57269887
福路公司代?各种?件刻章?牌,?到付款,qq57269887
?到付款,??面?全?（支持支付?交易）
?海代?身份?公章qq57269887
福路公司的?理??主要有以下几种：
1.代??海各?校各??????,自考??，成人高考，?考??，涵授，英?六???，?算机等???及各??案等.
2.代??海各?中?高??格?，如中????，高?工程??等等
3.代??海各种防?身份?，?口本香港身份?，?婚?，离婚?，?官?,房??，???照等等
4.代????，行??，小??牌，客??牌，???牌，武警?牌等等
5.?海代?身份?公章qq57269887等等
6.?海代?公章，企?公章，??公章及??外一切?件等等
作者:
kprnfdlpen 時間: 2011-2-3 10:44 AM 標題: ???家??算机三??★加QQ66698208★
???家??算机三??★加QQ66698208★???家??算机三??★加QQ：66698208★
???家??算机三??★加Q?66698208★??★???家??算机三??★加QQ666.982.08★
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作者:
fjwocmsldj 時間: 2011-2-3 11:03 AM 標題: 旬?代?身份?公章qq57269887
旬?代?身份?公章qq57269887
福路公司代?各种?件刻章?牌,?到付款,qq57269887
?到付款,??面?全?（支持支付?交易）
代?旬?身份?公章qq57269887
福路公司的?理??主要有以下几种：
1.代?旬?各?校各??????,自考??，成人高考，?考??，涵授，英?六???，?算机等???及各??案等.
2.代?各?中?高??格?，如中????，高?工程??等等
3.代?旬?各种防?身份?，?口本香港身份?，?婚?，离婚?，?官?,房??，???照等等
4.旬?代????，行??，小??牌，客??牌，???牌，武警?牌等等
5.旬?代?身份?公章qq57269887等等
6.旬?代?公章，企?公章，??公章及??外一切?件等等
作者:
kprnfdlpen 時間: 2011-2-3 12:13 PM 標題: 假的?算机2??★加QQ66698208★
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